Saturday, 26 January 2013

Saturday Kitchen - was it supposed to be funny?



 Ashley Banjo

Humour is a very personal reaction to situations. I enjoy cooking as anyone who follows my blog will have realised by now and I often cook on a Saturday morning accompanied by James Martin and his guests. I like to pick up tips and techniques. 

 James Martin


This morning he had the young man above as his guest along with two celebrity chefs one named Magnus from Norway who waxed lyrical about savoury porridge. Now this guy is some chef. His restaurant which sounds to be in the middle of nowhere - two hours drive from Trondheim and the 34th best eatery in the world. His porridge dish was no more than a tablespoon of food and had around 50 ingredients! In his restaurant he regularly serves meals with between 20 and 28 courses.
The two chefs take part in a silly challenge to try and cook the fastest omelette which is intended to be no more than a bit of fun. Magnus was new to this and took a minute to cook his omelette which did resemble what one would expect of a dish of that name but his comment on the thing produced by his rival was 'looks like shit!' for which James spent the rest of the show apologising for!

Back to Ashley, a tall, thin and very able dancer, who is appearing on a regular TV show. Part of the Kitchen show includes 'food heaven' or 'food hell' in other words the guests most or least favourite meal. Now this young dancer was obviously into healthy eating big style and his food heaven was chicken and food hell was pork. The decision as to which will be cooked comes from phone in and the celebrity chefs. Needless to say the poor lad was saddled with his food hell - the pork. I must admit I thought it looked delicious. The professional chefs ladled in loads of butter in the mashed potato and for cooking cabbage and talked about crackling and the need for fat from the meat in the gravy etc. I felt really sorry for Mr Banjo because he then had to taste the completed meal which he did manfully but unfortunately he started gipping and the camera had to focus on James Martin while he once again apologised for Magnus' faux pas and the credits rolled.

All-in-all quite amusing - you couldn't write it!

In fact writing humour is quite difficult but to lighten up your life, following the finding of horsemeat in Tesco Burgers:-

Not entirely sure how Tesco are going to get over this hurdle.

 Waitress in Tesco asked if I wanted anything on my Burger.    So I had a £5 each way !

The affordable way to buy your daughter the pony that she's always wanted!

  Had some burgers from Tesco for my tea last night....  I still have a bit between my teeth

  Unused HMV vouchers are now being accepted at Tesco.    Just tell them HMV means 'Horse Meat Voucher'

  Tesco are now testing all their vegetarian burgers for traces of  uniquorn

  Anyone want a burger from Tesco? yay or neigh?

  Tesco now forced to deny presence of zebra in burgers, as shoppers confuse barcodes for serving suggestions.

  A cow walks into a bar. Barman says 'why the long face?'    Cow says 'Illegal ingredients, coming over here stealing our jobs!'

  I hear the smaller version of those Tesco burgers make great horse d'oeuvres.

  Talk about flogging a dead.. NO! NO NO NO!

  To beef or not to beef...  That is equestrian

God Bless