It is the beginning of Christmas week. In a fortnight we will be in the year 2016 and the build up and fuss, which is principally commercial, will be over.
I was described this morning as 'prolific' and that is is part due to the fact that I blog daily but on more longer term projects I am also busy. Today I will be carrying out a first. I am reading one of my sonnets to the congregation in church at our carol concert. I am nervous. I have sung in shows and great halls but still this is different. It is me, the creator of the work, presenting it which has consequences.
Wise Magi followed a bright shining star
Young children pray for dazzling new presents
His influence spread to lands near and far
All on one event – a male child’s nascence
What is this all-pervading influence?
Why are the nations drawn to his caring?
A joiner of no great significance
generated great feelings of sharing.
Should we just accept our great good luck?
Lead our lives as He would want us to
Should we question the tales from the book?
Or follow the teachings as He would do
The beauty of Christmas – simplicity
The message followed with humility.
©David L Atkinson December 2012
The reason for the nervousness stems from the fact that I'm owning up to my words. This is a subject that has cropped up more than once in the last couple of days. I was told yesterday that I have the words to express my artistic side, for which I'm very grateful; and again today, I was indirectly complimented on the words that I produce.
That's great ... but!
There's always a 'but' with me and it stems from a lack of self-belief. The vicar picked the above sonnet for me to read because it fits with the theme of the service, but that little voice in my head is constantly nagging that it isn't good enough.
Don't worry I'm not touting for praise, but I want to know that what I do is good enough to be heard in public.
Then you hear the words of others, the stories and poetry and sometimes you don't like what is dished up. That is the risk. So to the decriers I say please keep your council.
The bottom line of course is that every word produced by me over the last few years are mine, driven by my experiences and my character. They may not be of great commercial value but they are mine and what the people will here this evening is from part of me. If what I produce isn't liked then I will either hear nothing or not be asked to repeat the exercise - only time will tell.