Saturday, 17 September 2016

Writing - 10 things in the news

Talking dolphins, lots about beer and a rampant old tortoise.

Image result for dolphin

1. Dolphins appear to talk in sentences.

Which is a step further along the evolutionary pathway than football supporters.


Image result for sperm shortage

2. New Zealand has a sperm shortage.

Ready for the call!


Image result for drone racing

3. There is a drone-racing league.

I thought they meant male bees.


Image result for dumb doctors

4. Doctors estimate dying patients will live twice as long as they actually do.

God decides.

Image result for swim bladders

5. Most beer contains a product made from the swim bladder of fish.

Very fishy.

Image result for how drunk are your friends

6. How drunk you think you are depends on how drunk your friends are.

Never a right answer.


Image result for Harvester restaurant Gloucester

7. A Harvester restaurant in Gloucester, England, already has its Christmas decorations up.

Only 98 days to go.


Image result for cotton picking

8. You can earn a washing machine by picking 10 tonnes of cotton in eastern Uzbekistan.

Hope it handles woollens and polyester also.


Image result for elderly olympics

9. There's an "elderly Olympics" in which residents of Swiss retirement homes compete against each other.

Carbon fibre zimmer frames as well?


Image result for rampant old tortoise

10. Diego, a 100-year-old tortoise, has fathered about 800 offspring on his native Galapagos Archipelago, helping save his species from extinction.

Smooth operator!


God Bless